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Advice Topic: Resilience

Take care of yourself during stressful times

Even in the best of times, completing your postdoc fellowship can be stressful. And, we can all agree that with the uncertainty around COVID-19, our collective stress level has increased. Beyond the normal worries (e.g., will my experiments work, will I be scooped, will I find a job after my postdoc, etc.), we are now concerned about how changes to campus operations may impact our research progress. Further, we are uncertain of the consequences that coronavirus may have on us at a personal level, as well as our family and loved ones. Simply put, these can make us feel more mentally stressed.

The growing mental health concerns in the graduate student population have received increasing attention in the past few years (see Nature, 2019, PhDs: the tortuous truth; Nature Biotechnology, 2018, Evidence for a mental health crisis in graduate education; and CBE-Life Sciences Education, 2019, Burnout and Mental Health Problems in Biomedical Doctoral Students, among others). And, just because you’re no longer a graduate student, it doesn’t mean that all of the mental health concerns go away once you transition to your postdoc position (see Science, 2014, The stressed-out postdoc). 

It’s important to remember that it’s normal not to feel 100% all the time. However, when the burdens of anxiety, depression, imposter syndrome, perfectionism, and harassment become overwhelming, it’s OK to seek help. 
UW recently re-designed our Health & Well-being website to provide a one-stop-shop for all relevant resources you might find helpful for your needs. For example, consult with the Counseling Center and they will provide you with referrals if you require long-term counseling. There are also resources to support your well-being and safety on campus. If you want to discuss events in your life or research group, reach out to the Office of the Ombud or our office, the Office of Postdoctoral Affairs (OPA). When in doubt, simply contact the SafeCampus 24/7 helpline (206- 685-SAFE), and trained professionals are ready to support you. 

There are also a number of online resources and support groups that you can explore to find the community that best suits your needs.

We all are responsible for supporting each other. We encourage all of you to be open about how common it is to experience issues related to mental health and to normalize and destigmatize the seeking of mental health care. Let’s support each other as you consider different career paths. Try reaching out to people who you think might be struggling and share some wellness tips with them, such as getting more sleep, doing exercise, cultivating a sense of purpose, and finding one’s community. For more tips, please read The Conversation (Meghan Duffy, 2018). With the support of the UW community, we will get through these trying times. 

Staying Motivated

Graduate school can be one of the most challenging experiences of your life. Not only are you working on multiple projects, putting in lab hours, or completing research, you may also be juggling additional roles as parents or caregivers, employees, leaders, or community volunteers. With everything you have to do, it’s no wonder that it can be difficult at times to stay motivated and on track. Below are just a few strategies to help you cultivate—and recuperate—motivation while you are in grad school.

Focus on what you can change. Losing motivation in graduate school can be a result of feeling like you have no control over your life. While it’s true that you can’t change things like a professor’s feedback on your assignments or internship and funding application deadlines, you do have agency over how you spend your time during the week. 1) Prioritize only the most important tasks you need to do throughout the day. 2) Break down large projects into smaller, manageable tasks. 3) Block out times of the day (or night) that you are most alert; use these 15 or 30 min. to free write, in order to chip away at a final paper draft. 4) Finally, work where you work best. Is this at your desk at home, in the library, or at a café with a study peer or two?

Recognize that you are not a failure. You are in graduate school because you are brilliant, intelligent, and have much to offer to your discipline or profession. At the same time, one of the biggest hurdles you can face in graduate school is the fear of failure. For some folks, this can be emotionally and psychologically taxing and reduces motivation. But there’s hope. You can acknowledge that failure is a result, not who you are as a person. Practice reframing failures as learning moments. As our colleague Gino Aisenberg (Associate Dean of Equity, Inclusion, and Diversity in The Graduate School) asserts, “You wouldn’t yell at a toddler for stumbling as they learn how to walk. So be gentle with yourself, while you learn, make mistakes, and grow in graduate school.” Read this article for additional tips on learning from failure.

Make time for you. Other times, lack of motivation can result from not getting your needs met as a whole person—because believe it or not—you are not just a graduate student. Also, it’s neither realistic nor healthy to be “constantly productive.” It’s important to invest time for wellness, hobbies, and connection. These may include a weekly chat with a friend or loved one, watching your favorite movie, making a nice meal for yourself, seeing your therapist, or individual time for self-reflection (e.g. journaling or practicing self-kindness and compassion). We do our best work, when we dedicate time in our lives to relax, recharge, and participate in non-work activities that engage our interests and bring us enjoyment.

See the bigger picture. Part of the challenge of completing a graduate degree is that incentives and rewards are delayed. This is why it’s especially important to stay focused on all the reasons you entered graduate school in the first place. Maybe you’re wanting to land that dream job in industry, interested in providing more financial stability for your family after completing your degree, or passionate about influencing policy that promotes social equity. All of these are valid reasons to stay motivated while working towards your degree. If you need to, jot down all the positive reasons why you are in graduate school. Revisit this list as a reminder of your bigger purpose, whenever you’re lacking motivation. 

We hope these strategies resonate with you, and feel free to share with us your tips for staying motivated!

Best,

Core Programs—Office of Graduate Student Affairs

UW Graduate School

Heading for the Finish Line

Whether you are enrolled in your very first quarter, or entering your third or more year of graduate study at the UW, the fall is always a busy time for meeting project deadlines, fulfilling work obligations, and taking care of family and community. We know you are looking forward to a well-deserved break. As you work through this week and the next, consider trying out the following strategies in order to help you finish the quarter on the right foot.

Protect your time. One way to stay on track during these last few weeks is to set boundaries with how you spend your time. Block out time slots you know you have to honor, such as hard deadlines for school, work, and family. Hold off on scheduling meetings and appointments that can realistically be postponed for a few weeks or more. Prioritize time in your daily schedule for short breaks away from your work space, to get some water, and for wellness and stress management activities that meet your particular needs.

Reach out for support. Every now and then life totally happens and we fall behind on papers and projects. Rather than spend time worrying about the possible outcomes of not turning in a final project, we encourage you to be proactive by asking your professor for an extension. You can do this by drafting an email to your professor. Briefly state why you are behind (e.g. family emergency, personal illness, need more guidance on understanding key concepts). Include any questions you may still have about the project. Finally, include a concrete plan for turning in your project in a reasonable amount of time. Have a peer proofread it before you click the send button. You could also have an in-person conversation with your professor during their office hours: just bring a draft of your project completion plan to help guide your conversation. More often than not, you will find that your professor is understanding and will work with you.

Reward yourself with self-care. It can all feel like one big blur after you’ve completed all your work for the quarter. We truly hope you dedicate time during the break to participate in activities that support you in feeling relaxed, rejuvenated and centered. This can include reading a non-academic book, cooking for yourself or loved ones, hiking or zumba, or catching up on episodes of your favorite tv show. You’ve earned the time to just be!

We hope these tips resonate with you, and have a wonderful break!

Best,

Core Programs—Office of Graduate Student Affairs
UW Graduate School

Why Celebrate?

We know this time of year is intense. There are flyers, emails, and Facebook posts about all kinds of events. When you are buried in final deadlines, it can be hard to think about attending anything. If you haven’t done so already, below are a few reasons why you should consider going to a UW end of year event. It’s worth it on many levels. Plus, you deserve it!

Celebrate being present. Graduate school is more like a marathon with obstacle courses than a sprint. We can get so caught up in the stress of everything we need to get done, that we either forget — or don’t realize — that it is possible for each of us to slow down and decrease the pressure. Between classes or meetings, take slow, deep breaths. Arrive 15 minutes early to your next appointment to reduce feeling stressed out. And as Kyla Minguez recommends in The Importance of Slowing Down, “Rushing makes us stressed, causes us to overlook important details of our lives, and fuels egocentrism… Take some time to wait between tasks. Drink a glass of water, watch the sky… whatever you need to do, just relax.” And don’t underestimate the power of just showing up for someone; your presence can make a huge difference.

Celebrate milestones. This can apply to everyone — from those of you who are graduating in just a few weeks to those of who you are still working toward your degrees next year — recognize and reward yourself for each step you have taken toward completing your degree. No one else is going to do this except you. Completed your first year in your grad program? Take yourself out to dinner (and invite a peer or friend or two). Wrote one sentence, paragraph, or page of your doctoral dissertation? Go camping for the weekend, because we know the sheer amount of concentration and determination it takes to even write one sentence of your dissertation. Set up an informational interview with a professional whose job mirrors your career interests? Go ahead, put your phone on silent and stream your favorite TV show for several hours. However you decide to reward yourself, enjoy it!

Celebrate in community. From departmental to university-wide ceremonies, we encourage you to consider the positive aspects of attending end-of-year events. Why? 1) Being around people can help you feel less isolated and can get you out of your head. 2) Related to the first point, you’ll never know what potential friendships or professional connections you’ll make if you don’t go. 3) Depending on the event, stay for as little or as long as you want. 4) Last but not least, there’s a strong chance you’ll be able to enjoy free food and refreshments!

Again, we hope you take some time to participate in one of several end-of-year celebrations across our tri-campus communities at the University of Washington!

Best,

Core Programs Team
#UWGradSuccess

Re-Energize For the Final Push

Spring quarter can be a hectic and nerve-wracking time. Many of you are preparing to graduate while in the midst of job searches or considering job offers. Others are continuing work related to earning that graduate degree next year — or within the next several years. Every day this quarter, we truly see how hard you’re all working.

Last week on the Seattle campus, first-generation graduate students gathered and utilized collage-making as a creative practice to focus on things re-energize them for this last leg of the quarter. As you gather your own energy for these final weeks, consider some of the prompt questions from that gathering. We hope you find these strategies useful:

List out, activities, responsibilities or other things that are draining your energy right now. Initially, this may seem like an odd prompt to consider. Yet sometimes, when we’re overwhelmed, anxious or just plain frustrated with the sheer amount of work we do on a daily or weekly basis, we can get in a real funk and start believing that we don’t have any control over our lives. We recommend taking just three to five minutes to brainstorm a list. Then step back and consider what things you can let go of, minimize or set boundaries around.

Focus on what you do have control over. Do you have too many commitments, some of which you can realistically hold off on? Would breaking down projects into manageable tasks be helpful to you? Is your workspace cluttered (we are guilty of this one!), and can you find a different space such as a cafe or library to work? Are you taking breaks from social media, especially when your news feed feels like too much? Are there individuals in your life who zap the energy out of you, whom you don’t have to interact with? (Note: this last one is complicated, because what about individuals whom we have to interact with regularly? Check out this article).

Make room for moments, people and activities (cultural, spiritual, creative, community-based) that bring you energy. On your bathroom mirror or in your workspace, post a quote that you helps you feel motivated. Start your day by listening to a song that energizes or soothes you. Make time in your schedule to call or spend time with a friend or loved one. Step away from work and take a 10 minute walk outside to enjoy the sunshine. Participate in activities or hobbies that validate all of who you are — because you are not just graduate students but whole people. If it helps, create your own vision board collage with images of your favorite energizing elements so you can see them everyday.

We hope that you take time to participate in one of several end-of-year celebrations across the University of Washington. You deserve it!

Best,

Core Programs Team
#UWGradSuccess

Lonely and Isolated in Grad School

I am a first year Ph.D. student and feel lonely all the time. There are several days when I go without any human contact except with students in my office hours. It’s strangely suffocating. I am still not part of any lab, so there are no labmates to hang out with. My classmates go to their labs straight after class so can’t hang out after class.

—Is This How It’s Supposed To Be

This post originally ran November 2016. It has been updated slightly. 

This answer is courtesy of Jaye Sablan, assistant director, Core Programs, Office of Student Affairs in the the Graduate School.

First off, thank you so much for reaching out. I know how hard it can be in academia to share emotional vulnerability, and I totally hear you. Graduate school and its demands can create an atmosphere that feels isolating and alienating to graduate students. No, this is *not* how graduate school is supposed to be, or how it needs to be, though we hear you that this is how it *is.* Know that your feelings are totally normal, and many grad students have similar experiences. When I was in grad school, the cues that I was feeling disconnected were usually a combination of headaches, not being able to eat, inability to focus, and generally feeling alone on a campus with thousands of people around me. It also didn’t help that faculty, staff, and grad peers were busy in their own work that they (unintentionally) failed to notice I was struggling.

Here are a few things that helped me manage feeling isolated, and I’m wondering if they would be helpful to you:

  • What do I need right now at this moment to feel connected to my body? A stretch, deep breaths, a healthy snack, a glass of water.
  • Whom can I connect with to talk things through or feel vulnerable with (this one is a tough one, but you’ve already reached out to me ITHISTB)? Family members or friends via a visit, phone call or Skype, my department’s GPA, off- or on-campus counselors (reaching out to more than one person is better).
  • If I can’t connect with peers in my department yet, what organizations on campus can get me those face-to-face connections with other grads? GPSS and their events, grad student organizations, Center for Teaching and Learning (you mentioned being a TA, so that might be a place to start), Core Programs, etc.
  • What other interests do have I have outside of academia that I need to intentionally make room for in my schedule? Dancing, going to see live music, baking, visiting museums, town hall talks, getting to know the city that I moved to for grad school.

Again, ITHISTB, I am so very grateful that you reached out, and I hope this message resonates with you. Again, no, this is not how graduate school should be, and there are ways to decrease isolation — including connecting with others, which is so important and vital for all of us studying and working in academia. If you’d like, please let me know if you’d like a specific list of campus resources to connect with. Looking forward to hearing from you.

Ask Your Grad School Guide is an advice column for all y’all graduate and professional students. Real questions from real students, answered by real people. If the Guide doesn’t know the answer, the Guide will seek out experts all across campus to address the issue. (Please note: The Guide is not a medical doctor, therapist, lawyer or academic advisor, and all advice offered here is for informational purposes only.) Submit a question for the column →

Slowing Down, Being Present

As the spring quarter begins, we know that many of you will be experiencing anxiety over fulfilling requirements for your very first —or final — year in your grad program, planning your career trajectory beyond the UW, or managing your time to balance work, family, and graduate school. As the weeks go by, the work will seem to just pile up. This is real.

The good thing is, you can approach being a graduate student from a totally different perspective — by being intentional and mindful. We invite you to take a deep breath (really, a full breath in and out), create some space for yourself to slow down, and check out some possible strategies for being mindful that you can consider incorporating into your schedule.

Resist busyness. There’s an unspoken culture in graduate school that perpetuates the idea that over-productivity is a good thing: that performing and talking about how busy we are is key to being successful in a graduate program. Stanford Career Coach Dr. Chris Golde offers a different perspective and states, “Graduate students report more than can be done.” She recommends slowing down “to make peace with [our] limitations,” and says “there will always be those around you — students and faculty — who accomplish far more than you do. Hold yourself to a standard of what is realistic for you.”

Set achievable goals. It can be tempting during this time of the year to be overly ambitious about your goals, and setting an unrealistic standard for yourself can actually lead to you not achieving what’s most important to you — whether you are in career planning mode, completing your capstone, thesis or dissertation, or working on or off campus. Again, we invite you to slow down. We know that when we were in graduate school, goal setting wasn’t something that we suddenly knew how to do. Take some time to map out and visualize your goals. And finally, we encourage you to reward yourself for each task you complete towards your end goals.

Be mindful. Mindfulness can simply be defined as taking time to observe your thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations from moment to moment, without judgment. Why would this be beneficial to practice while you are in graduate school? Research has shown that over time, mindfulness can help us be more compassionate to ourselves and people in our communities, help us be less reactive and more calm in the face of conflict, and help us increase our focus to what truly matters in our lives.

We hope these strategies are helpful to you as you as you navigate the new quarter!

Your mental health and well-being matter to us,

Core Programs Team
#UWGradSuccess

When You’re Feeling Doubts About Graduate School

Feeling self-doubt about whether or not you belong in graduate school is actually a normal experience for many Master’s and doctoral Students. These doubts and anxieties can arise for any number of reasons. Below are just a few that we’ve heard about from your peers, and maybe they will resonate with you as well. Included are tips and strategies on how to move through these feelings.

Feeling like an imposter. Ever feel like you’re not intelligent enough to be in graduate school: like somehow your peers or department will “find out that you’re just not cut out” to be at the UW? Also known as imposter syndrome, these nagging, negative feelings and self-talk are actually quite common for most graduate students, and can make you question your talents, strengths, and resilience. Remember that you do belong in graduate school because you are passionate about your research project, enhancing your professional development, or wanting to make a positive contribution to your communities by earning a graduate degree.

Accessing resources. Your life is busy: balancing your degree requirements, a job or two, and family or community responsibilities is quite a task even when all those areas of your life are important to you. During the thick of it all, anxiety can creep up and make you feel like you aren’t capable of fulfilling your goals and commitments. It’s in those moments, that you can pause and ask yourself: Am I getting my needs met? Maybe there’s a campus or community resource you need to access to make sure you are getting what you need on an individual level, whether that be your campus recreation center, alone or quiet time with a good book or a walk, quality time with friends off campus, mental health support, or even a good meal.

Feeling exhausted. We know you’re all working hard as graduate students, and hard work can get the best of us. Given the rigors of graduate school, this can lead to feelings of exhaustion or possibly even burnout. Again, take pause. Can you ask for an extension on a project? Do you need to take an academic leave of absence? Even better, is there someone you can check in with to help you make a plan for getting much-needed rest, along with ways to move forward after your break? The length of your break is particular to you and your circumstances. Recognizing that you need some time away doesn’t mean you’re a failure, it means you are invested in your success as a whole person.

Remembering your purpose. It’s good to reflect back on why you decided to be a graduate student. Once you are in graduate school, your reasons may actually change over time, especially as you continue to explore how your degree may get you where you want to be in the future. Sometimes your interests and needs really do change, and the path you are on may no longer serve you. This is also a normal experience for many graduate students, and you can talk about it with people you trust on your mentoring team, with close friends, or you can schedule an appointment to talk with us at Core Programs. Talking it over with people you trust can help make sure that your judgment isn’t being clouded by any of the reasons we discussed above. And making an informed decision to take what you have learned thus far, and bringing it into your next phase of life, can be just what you need to do.

We hope you find these strategies useful and let us know what has worked for you!

Best Regards,

Core Programs Team
#UWGradSuccess

Digging Deep for the Final Push

Spring is the time of year where several big projects come to the fore.  Your to-do lists may include one—or more—of the following:  doing a job search, writing up your thesis or capstone summary, continuing work on that dissertation, defending your dissertation, or making arrangements to move with your family after graduation.  And by no means are these small tasks.  So it’s no wonder why, for different reasons (a task feels too big, intimidating, or the long-term benefits don’t seem readily apparent because of immediate stress or anxiety), we put off doing these projects.

First things first, you are definitely not alone in these feelings. We at Core Programs hear you and encourage you to dig deep for that final push this quarter.  Fortunately, there are strategies that can help you do just that.  Below are just a few:

Practice self-compassion.  One of the biggest reasons we might procrastinate from doing a task is because we judge ourselves internally before we even begin.  We might tell ourselves that we “need to be perfect,” or that we are “incompetent” or “undeserving” of a graduate degree, getting that job after graduation, or even success in general.  Sometimes these are feelings we internalize, rather than verbal messages.  And all of this can stop us in right our tracks.  One way to move through negative self-talk is to practice being mindful.  When negative thoughts come up, avoid over-identifying with those thoughts and say to yourself, “That’s interesting that I’m thinking that.”  If you do judge yourself for not working on one of your projects, that’s a perfect moment to be self-compassionate. You can ask yourself, “What would a caring friend say to me right now?”

Negotiate with yourself.  We all have ways we can avoid getting things done.  For some of us, it’s spending a few hours on Netflix.  For others, it might be reading a book we enjoy, rather than the required reading for a graduate seminar.  Still for others, it might be playing video games.  And let’s be real—completely denying yourself of a coping mechanism for stress is neither realistic nor the complete answer.  Might you meet yourself halfway?  For example, can you set aside time in your schedule to write for 15 min., then watch a 30 min. Netflix show—eventually working your way up to 30 min. writing increments?  The goal is not to deprive yourself or even judge yourself for avoiding, but to aim for breaking down your projects into manageable tasks.

Be resourceful.  One important skill we know you have as graduate students is being resourceful.  You have developed this skill over time, and this has helped you tap into your strengths to navigate the university system, your graduate education program, and life in general.   It is also perfectly okay to reach out for support when you need it.  Check in with a peer, loved one, or member of your thesis or dissertation committee to hold you accountable to breaking down and completing your projects in a realistic manner—and to remind you to reward yourself for each, no matter big or small.  You can also schedule an appointment with at a UW writing center, form a writing group, or meet with advisors at your campus career center.

We hope you found these strategies useful, and we know you can do it!

Best,

Core Programs Team

Additional Resources

Work-Life Balance? For Real?

The aspiration of “work-life balance” is often recommended in our everyday lives, but this approach can be met with a sense of dread rather than a sense of hope. Really though, when the demands of work and life seem to be unending, how can we possibly keep it all in “balance”? This can feel so true, especially if the popular analogy to life balance–that of tipping scales–feels all together inaccurate. In actuality, most of us have more than one set of “scales” in our lives (e.g. graduate school, additional jobs on or off campus, family and community commitments, self-care, etc.), and they can often feel like they are in competition with each another. Below are some possible ways to rethink how we might approach working towards work-life integration rather than “balance.”

Integration. Some have talked about “work-life integration.” The idea is that a life worth living is better served if your passions and life commitments are incorporated or expressed in your daily work. This is not to say that we don’t have obligations that we just plain have to do. But this perspective does however allow us to ask ourselves, “During any given work week, do I have opportunities to feed my passions and core commitments in some way?”

Separation. That said, sometimes what refuels you is practicing setting clear boundaries between work and play or being able to volunteer with community groups or organizations that have nothing to do with graduate school work or a job. These are important projects too and—as David Whyte would say—are still integrated in that you are stoking your own fires in service to your work and your engagement in your life.

Reflection. How do you spend your days? Your weeks? Are you happy with your personal mix of commitments and activities? Is the mix serving you and contributing to your ability to be your best self –whether at work or at home with friends and family? Many of us need to do a mental “check-in” on these questions every few months or so, and when necessary, adjust the mix. The aspiration of “work-life balance” is often recommended in our everyday lives, but this approach can be met with a sense of dread rather than a sense of hope. Really though, when the demands of work and life seem to be unending, how can we possibly keep it all in “balance”? This can feel so true, especially if the popular analogy to life balance–that of tipping scales–feels all together inaccurate. In actuality, most of us have more than one set of “scales” in our lives (e.g. graduate school, additional jobs on or off campus, family and community commitments, self-care, etc.), and they can often feel like they are in competition with each another. Below are some possible ways to rethink how we might approach working towards work-life integration rather than “balance.”

Integration. Some have talked about “work-life integration.” The idea is that a life worth living is better served if your passions and life commitments are incorporated or expressed in your daily work. This is not to say that we don’t have obligations that we just plain have to do. But this perspective does however allow us to ask ourselves, “During any given work week, do I have opportunities to feed my passions and core commitments in some way?”

Separation. That said, sometimes what refuels you is practicing setting clear boundaries between work and play or being able to volunteer with community groups or organizations that have nothing to do with graduate school work or a job. These are important projects too and—as David Whyte would say—are still integrated in that you are stoking your own fires in service to your work and your engagement in your life.

Reflection. How do you spend your days? Your weeks? Are you happy with your personal mix of commitments and activities? Is the mix serving you and contributing to your ability to be your best self –whether at work or at home with friends and family? Many of us need to do a mental “check-in” on these questions every few months or so, and when necessary, adjust the mix.

We hope that these strategies for work-life integration are useful to you. Also, please let us know if you have other tips or strategies, and we’ll share them out!

Best,

Kelly, Jaye, and Ziyan

Acknowledgements

Thanks to Professor Carolyn Allen’s class of first year doctoral students in English, who inspired this reflection.

Additional Resources

We hope that these strategies for work-life integration are useful to you. Also, please let us know if you have other tips or strategies, and we’ll share them out!

Best,

Kelly, Jaye, and Ziyan

Acknowledgements

Thanks to Professor Carolyn Allen’s class of first year doctoral students in English, who inspired this reflection.

Additional Resources